The decision

Every change begins with a decision, not with the first step. Saint John Climacus, a seventh-century monk of Sinai, puts exactly this on the first rung of his Ladder: renouncing the life that wears you out. The monk left the world. A man with a family and a job stays in the world, but leaves behind the empty way of living in it.

John says it matters not only that you set out, but why. Whoever sets out from fear is like incense: first it gives off a scent, then it turns to smoke. Whoever sets out for a reward is like a millstone that keeps turning in the same circle. Whoever sets out from love receives a fire that grows like a forest fire.

You can see this without a monastery. A man who gives up drink out of fear for his health holds out until the fear fades. A man who gives it up for his children holds out.

Fear gives strength for a week. Love, for a lifetime.

So before the first change, write one sentence: why I want to live differently. If there is only fear in that sentence, the start will be quick and the end near. After that John asks for two more things: cut one bad habit at once, and every day add ember to ember.

The question remains: once the reason is clear, what should you give up first?

N. Ž.